Conflict Hexagram 95: Leading Teams Through Disputes — Fairness Isn’t Everything

Most of the time, a leader isn’t handling business—they’re settling disputes.

Two departments fight over resources, each sticking to their own arguments, and come to you for a verdict.

Two subordinates clash, both convinced they’ve been wronged, and both come to you to vent their grievances.

Even two partners with differing views on the next strategic direction, locked in a bitter quarrel, will eventually leave the final call to you.

What do leaders fear most? Not having no work to do, but that every side is equally close to their heart—no matter how they rule, someone will be unhappy. Rule in favor of one side, and you’re accused of bias; split things too evenly, and you’re called a fence-sitter; rule too harshly, and you’re labeled unfeeling.

So how exactly should you make the call?

The fifth line of the *Conflict* hexagram in the *I Ching* speaks to the mindset of a adjudicator. It’s just four characters, but they carry immense weight: **"讼，元吉。" (Song, yuan ji / Conflict, supreme good fortune)**

Why Is Nine in the Fifth Place the Only "Supreme Good Fortune" in the Conflict Hexagram?

Among the six lines of the *Conflict* hexagram, the others are either inauspicious, dangerous, or "without fault" (meaning no disaster is already a win). Only Nine in the Fifth Place brings "supreme good fortune"—great luck from start to finish.

Why?

Because Nine in the Fifth Place occupies the ruler’s position, sitting at the center of the upper trigram: it is strong, upright, and centered. It holds the highest, most balanced position in the hexagram—it is the referee, the judge, the one with the final say.

Everyone else is fighting; only it is not in the position of fighting. It is there to judge.

This is fascinating. If you fight from inside the fray, even if you win, both sides suffer losses. If you stand outside the fray to judge, you are the one who meets with good fortune.

So the first layer of meaning of Nine in the Fifth Place is this: **Don’t get dragged into the dispute yourself—stand on higher ground to adjudicate.**

Many leaders are the very source of conflict themselves. Today they badmouth one person to another, tomorrow they badmouth that person to this one, and when their subordinates end up clashing, they can’t even figure out how it started.

A true master never steps into the ring personally. They stand above, watching those below fight, then step in to deliver the final verdict at the right moment. The less they’re caught up in the fray, the more weight their words carry.

The Prerequisite for Supreme Good Fortune Is "Upright Centeredness"

But not everyone who acts as a referee can attain "supreme good fortune."

If you’re a biased referee, you’ll end up worse off than anyone else.

Why can Nine in the Fifth Place bring supreme good fortune? Because it is "upright and centered"—strong, upright, and centered. Both qualities are indispensable.

"Centered" means being impartial, taking no sides. "Upright" means having clear principles and following the rules.

You might ask: when a leader settles disputes, is fairness the most important thing? Yes, but not entirely.

Wen Laoshi once said: **What employees want in their hearts isn’t absolute fairness—it’s "I feel this is fair."** No matter how fair you think your ruling is, if the people involved think you’re biased, then you are biased in their eyes.

So how do you make the parties involved feel it’s fair? It relies on two things.

First, **you must have credibility.** Do you conduct yourself with integrity day to day? Do you act out of self-interest? Have your past rulings been even-handed? Everyone notices these things. If you’re consistently even-handed, when trouble really hits, people will trust whatever you say. If you’re always playing favorites, no amount of explanation will help when the time comes.

Second, **you must lay out the rules upfront.** The *Hexagram Judgment* of the *Conflict* hexagram says, "The superior person lays plans at the start of affairs"—the best way to handle disputes is to set the rules right from the beginning. When everyone knows what the rules are, and things are handled according to the rules when trouble arises, no one has anything to complain about. The problem is when there are no rules in normal times, and you make up rules on the fly when something goes wrong—no matter how you set them, someone will think you’re biased.

The "upright centeredness" of Nine in the Fifth Place isn’t a pose you strike in the moment—it’s **trust built up over a long period of time.**

The Adjudication Mindset of Nine in the Fifth Place of the Conflict Hexagram

When it comes to how to actually settle disputes, this line holds several layers of mindset wisdom.

First layer of mindset: **Don’t jump into the fray lightly.**

Many leaders, the moment they hear their subordinates are clashing, rush right in to pass judgment. But in the process, they end up becoming a party to the conflict themselves—what was a dispute between two people turns into a dispute between three.

What’s the smarter approach? Don’t rush to take a side. Let both sides say their piece, let their emotions vent. More often than not, people aren’t fighting over the principle of the thing—they’re fighting over pride. Once their pride is soothed, the issue becomes easy to resolve.

Don’t be in a hurry to play the judge—be a listener first. Only speak after you’ve heard everyone out. When you do speak, your words set the tone; the longer you wait to speak, the more weight they carry.

Second layer of mindset: **Judge the issue, not the person.**

When two people clash, don’t comment on who’s good or bad, who’s right or wrong. Only address the matter itself—how this issue should be handled, what the rules are, what happens next.

The moment you comment on the person, saying things like "You’re just too impatient" or "You’re just too stubborn," the other person will blow up instantly. They were originally fighting with the other party; now they’re fighting with you.

That’s why high-level leaders, when settling disputes, only talk about the issue, not the person. Once the matter is resolved, the relationship can still be preserved.

Third layer of mindset: **Leave both sides an out.**

Nine in the Fifth Place brings "supreme good fortune" not because its ruling is perfectly correct, but because after it rules, everyone can accept the outcome.

How do you make everyone accept the outcome? It’s not about giving both sides an equal scolding—that’s just fence-sitting. It’s about **letting the winner win with dignity, and letting the loser lose without disgrace.**

For the winner, acknowledge the parts of their argument that are valid, so they feel their fight was worth it. For the loser, give them a graceful way out—for example, "Your intentions were good, there’s just room for improvement in your approach." Don’t back people into a corner; even a rabbit will bite when it’s cornered.

This is the magic of Nine in the Fifth Place’s "upright centeredness"—"centered" means not going to extremes; "upright" means holding the bottom line. Don’t go to extremes, and everyone has a way forward; hold the bottom line, and the rules won’t break.

A Good Adjudicator Has These Three Qualities

All that said, a truly effective adjudicator who can attain "supreme good fortune" must have three qualities.

First, **moral backbone.** You yourself must walk straight and sit upright. If you have no self-interest, you can speak with firmness. If your own hands aren’t clean, what right do you have to judge others’ affairs?

Second, **patience.** Don’t rush to conclusions. Let the dust settle for a bit, let both sides fully speak their minds. Many conflicts dissolve once everything is out in the open. If you rush to play judge, you’ll only turn small conflicts into big ones.

Third, **a sense of proportion.** Know what to say and what not to say; know what to meddle in and what to leave alone. For some small matters, you can turn a blind eye and let