What Happens If You Overdecorate? Hexagram Bi Third Line: "Bi Ru Ru Ru" — Don’t Let Appearance Hijack Your Life

The Line Text for the Nine in the Third Place of the Hexagram of Grace states: "贲如濡如，永贞吉 (Bi Ru Ru Ru, Yong Zhen Ji: Adorned and glowing, perseverance brings good fortune)."

"Bi Ru" means being elaborately decorated. "Ru Ru" means being radiant, glowing with vitality and a polished sheen.

Put together, it describes a person who has dressed themselves up beautifully, looking dazzling and utterly impressive on the outside.

But three words follow: "Yong Zhen Ji". What does it mean? It means you must always hold fast to the right path, stay true to your original heart, and never lose yourself — only then will you have good fortune.

Why add this line? Because decoration can easily go too far. When it does, people get carried away, forget their roots, and start mistaking the packaging for the actual substance.

Wen Laoshi once said something that stuck with me deeply —

These days, a lot of people aren't living their own lives; they're performing a "perfect version of themselves" for others. They perform on social media, at gatherings, in casual chats, even with their own families. By the end of the performance, even they believe it — that they're this shiny, glamorous person.

But when late night hits, when trouble comes, when they finally take off the mask, they realize — there's nothing underneath.

This is exactly what the Nine in the Third Place of the Hexagram of Grace is about: no matter how beautiful your outer decoration is, never forget who you are. Staying true to your original heart is the only real good fortune.

Are you living your life, or "packaging" your life?

Let me ask you first: when you post on social media, how many times do you do it to record your life, and how many times do you do it to "show off" your life?

I've seen so many people sit down for a meal, and when the food arrives, they don't pick up their chopsticks first — they pick up their phones to take photos. They spend half an hour shooting, an hour editing, another half hour picking a caption. After posting, they refresh every two minutes to check for likes and comments.

They have no idea what the meal even tasted like. They don't care if the food is good; they care if other people think their life is good.

Then there are people who buy a new bag, then spend a whole afternoon sitting in a café just to take nice photos of it for social media. It doesn't matter if the bag is actually expensive — what matters is that other people know they have it.

Some people even travel not to see the sights or relax, but to take a nine-photo grid post, check in at a location, and prove "I've been there". It doesn't matter if the attraction is actually nice — what matters is that on social media, I look like I'm living an exciting life.

Is that living? No. That's packaging your life.

After all that packaging, whose life is it anyway? It's the life other people see, not your own.

This is exactly what "Bi Ru Ru Ru" of the Nine in the Third Place describes — polished and glowing on the surface, looking perfect, but who is this perfection for? Most of the time, it's for other people.

The problem is, other people thinking you have it good has nothing to do with whether you actually have it good.

You can get ten thousand likes on your post, but you'll still lie awake at night with insomnia.

You can own ten luxury bags, but you'll still feel anxious.

You can travel to ten countries, but you'll still feel empty inside.

These things don't fix the root problem. Because the root problem is on the inside, not the outside.

That's why the line adds "Yong Zhen Ji" — you must always remember who you are, what you want, and what you truly care about. Don't get so busy decorating that you lose yourself in the process.

Why do people get trapped by outward appearances?

You might say: I know all this, but I just can't help it. When I see everyone else looking so put-together, I want to look better, be more impressive, make people envy me a little — is that wrong?

No, it's not wrong. Pursuing beauty is human nature. But the problem is, many people start pursuing it and then lose their way.

Why do they lose their way? Three reasons.

First: we mix up cause and effect.

A lot of people think: if I package myself well, other people will like me, respect me, and approve of me. Then I'll be confident, happy, and successful.

But the truth is the opposite: first you approve of yourself, find your own value, and build a solid, steady life for yourself — then you'll naturally glow from within. That's when other people will be drawn to you and recognize your worth.

Packaging is the result, not the cause.

If you're empty on the inside, no amount of packaging will make you anything more than an empty shell. It'll blow over in the wind, leak in the rain. After spending time with you, people will naturally sense — this person has nothing to them.

But if you're full on the inside, even if you dress simply, people will talk to you for a few minutes and think — this person is something special.

So don't get it backwards. Work on your inner strength first, then worry about packaging. When your inner strength is solid, the right packaging will come naturally. Without it, no matter how pretty the outside is, it's all hollow.

Second: we care too much about what other people think.

Humans are social creatures, so it's normal to care about others' opinions. But if every decision you make, every effort you put in, every bit of joy you feel depends on how other people see you — you're in trouble.

Why? Because other people's opinions change all the time. Today this is trendy, so you perform in this direction. Tomorrow that's popular, so you have to switch to that. You'll always be chasing, never catching up, always exhausted.

And the scariest part? After all that chasing, the "good" you end up with is what other people think is good — not what you think is good.

You buy a bag everyone says is beautiful, but it's uncomfortable to carry.

You take a job everyone says is respectable, but it makes you miserable.

You get with a partner everyone says is a perfect match, but you don't love them.

You become the "winner at life" in everyone else's eyes, but you know better than anyone whether you're actually happy.

The saddest thing in life isn't not getting what other people want — it's getting what other people want, and losing what you want for yourself.

Third: we're afraid to face our true selves.

Why do so many people obsess over packaging themselves? Because their true self might not be that great.

Maybe they're not rich enough, not attractive enough, not talented enough, not successful enough. Maybe they have lots of flaws, lots of weaknesses, lots of little thoughts they'd rather not show anyone.

Admitting all that is too painful. So we cover it up with packaging — I wear expensive clothes, go to fancy places, know impressive people, so I don't look that bad.

But covering up a problem doesn't fix it — it just delays it. The thicker the cover, the more rotten what's underneath gets. When the cover finally can't hold it anymore, the collapse is even worse.

What is real confidence? It's not that I'm perfect at everything. It's that I know I have a lot of flaws, but I still accept myself.

I'm average-looking, but I have a great personality.

I don't make a lot of money, but I have enough to get by.

I'm not the best, but I'm trying my best.

When you accept your true self, you don't need all that packaging anymore. Because you're secure in who you are — this is who I am, like it or not, but I like myself just fine.

People with that kind of confidence look good no matter how they live.

How to break free from the trap of appearances and find your true self?

Now that we've talked about the problems, how do we fix them? Three methods, matching the "Yong Zhen" of the Nine in the Third Place — always holding fast to your original heart.

First method: regularly "take off the makeup" — strip away all the packaging and see what's left of you.

What does "taking off the makeup" mean? Not literally washing your face. It means temporarily setting aside all your social identities, all your external labels, all your material packaging, and asking yourself —

If I didn't have this job, who would I be?

If I didn't have this money, who would I be?

If I didn't have these connections, who would I be?

If no one was watching me, no one judging me, who would I be?

What do I truly love?

What am I truly good at?

What do I truly want?

Can you answer these questions?

A lot of people can't. Because it's been so long since they've had a real conversation with themselves. They spend all their time and energy on "making other people think I'm great", and they forget who they really are and what they really want.

So set aside regular time for yourself — be alone, be quiet, talk to yourself. Tear off all those messy labels, and look at the real you underneath, deep down.

When you find yourself again, you won't be trapped by appearances anymore.

Second method: tell the difference between "what I need" and "what I want".

A lot of people are unhappy because they treat "what they want" as "what they need".

What do you need? The things you must have to live a good life. Enough to eat, warm clothes, a place to live, something to do, someone to love. That's all you need.

What do you want? The things you see other people have and decide you want too. A bigger house, a nicer car, a more expensive bag, a higher position, more attention. These things are nice to have, but you won't die without them.

What you need is actually very little. What you want is endless. You'll never finish chasing all the things you want.

So every time you want to buy something, do something, fight for something, ask yourself first — do I really need this, or do I just want it? Do I want it for myself, or do I want it because everyone else has it?

When you think it through, you'll find that a lot of the things you're dying to have don't actually matter at all.

Spend your energy and money on the things that truly matter, and your life will be so much lighter.

Third method: shift your focus from "what other people think of me" to "what I think of myself".

This is the most fundamental one.

The reason you get trapped by appearances is that you've given other people the power to judge your worth. If someone says you're great, you're happy. If someone says you're not, you're sad. If people envy you, you feel successful. If people look down on you, you feel like a failure.

That's way too passive.

You need to take that power back — whether I'm good enough is up to me. My worth doesn't need to be proven by anyone else. My life is good enough if I'm satisfied with it.

How do you take it back? It's simple — pay more attention to your own feelings, less to other people's opinions.

When you buy clothes, ask yourself if they're comfortable first, then if they look good.

When you choose a job, ask yourself if you enjoy it first, then if it's respectable.

When you live your daily life, ask yourself if it feels steady and fulfilling first, then if other people would envy it.

When you put your own feelings first, other people's opinions will naturally fade into the background.

At the end of the day, you live your life for yourself, not for anyone else. Being comfortable in your own skin matters more than anything.

Final Thoughts

"贲如濡如，永贞吉 (Bi Ru Ru Ru, Yong Zhen Ji: Adorned and glowing, perseverance brings good fortune)" from the Nine in the Third Place of the Hexagram of Grace is such a good reminder.

There's nothing wrong with decoration, nothing wrong with looking good. But remember — decoration is there to make you better, not to replace you.

No matter how pretty the packaging is, if there's nothing inside, no one will buy it a second time.

No matter how good you look on the outside, if you're empty inside, no one will want to get close to you.

So don't just focus on putting on makeup, wearing nice clothes, posting on social media. Save some time and energy to put things in your mind, in your heart, in your bones.

When you have substance on the inside, that's when you can truly stand on your own two feet.

Being adorned and glowing is important, but what matters more is — Yong Zhen, perseverance in staying true to yourself.

Never lose yourself, never stray from the right path, never forget your roots.

That kind of beauty is real beauty. That kind of life is truly fortunate.