What to Do When Love Hits Rock Bottom? Hexagram Splitting Apart Sixth Line Five: "String of Fish, the Consorts Receive Favor" — Those Who Stay With You in Low Points Truly Care

As the Hexagram of Splitting Apart (山地剥) unfolds downward, things take a slightly different turn when we reach the Six in the Fifth Place (六五).

At the Six at the Beginning (初六), the bed’s legs are rotted; at the Six in the Second Place (六二), the bed’s frame gives way; at the Six in the Third Place (六三), everyone who can leave has gone; at the Six in the Fourth Place (六四), one hits rock bottom and even suffers harm to the skin.

When we arrive at the Six in the Fifth Place, the Line Text (爻辞) reads: 贯鱼以宫人宠，无不利。

What does this mean? It describes a lead fish guiding a whole school of fish, like the palace consorts who receive the ruler’s favor one after another in proper order—nothing that does not further.

Wen Laoshi says that the Six in the Fifth Place of the Hexagram of Splitting Apart is the most fascinating line in the entire hexagram. While everyone else is slipping downward, this line declares “nothing that does not further.” Why? Because it shifts its perspective: instead of competing to see who climbs higher, it values who stays by your side.

The Six in the Fifth Place is a Yin Line (陰爻) occupying a Yang position, sitting directly below the topmost Yang Line of the hexagram, and serves as the leader of all the Yin lines. Four Yin lines follow beneath it, and it leads the group forward. It is like a school of fish: the head leads the body and tail, all swimming neatly in the same direction.

Applied to relationships, the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart teaches this: when times are hard and you hit rock bottom, the person who is still willing to stand by you and walk with you is the one you should cherish most. At such moments, a relationship is not sustained by passion, novelty, or external conditions—it is held together by sheer will and commitment. Hold on, and nothing will fail to go well.

Many relationships fall apart during good times. When circumstances improve, money flows in, and options multiply, people’s hearts grow restless. But the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart reminds us that the true test of a relationship is never how sweet it is when things go well, but how steady it is when things go wrong. Everyone treats you well when you are thriving—that means nothing. Someone who still treats you well when you are down? That is real.

What the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart Truly Means

贯鱼以宫人宠，无不利。

“贯鱼” (a string of fish) means a school of fish, one following another in perfect order. “宫人宠” (favor of palace consorts) refers to the imperial harem’s concubines receiving the ruler’s grace one after another.

This line may sound like a description of ancient imperial harem life, but it is not. It speaks of a kind of order—order and warmth that can be preserved even in the hardest of times.

The Hexagram of Splitting Apart is a hexagram of decline, with everyone slipping downward. But the Six in the Fifth Place is different: it does not fall. It leads everyone forward. How does it lead? Not through power, suppression, or coercion—but through “favor”: through treating others with sincerity, equality, and making everyone feel valued.

The image of the string of fish is very telling. Fish swim with the current, not against it. The Six in the Fifth Place does not drag everyone upward by force; it follows the flow of the situation and leads the group forward. It does not fight or scramble, does not push or crowd—one by one, no one is left behind.

The Xiang Commentary (象傳) states: “By receiving favor in the manner of palace consorts, there is ultimately no cause for resentment.” What does this mean? If you treat others with genuine kindness, they will treat you the same way in return. It is the same with relationships: if you treat your partner sincerely even when you are at a low point, they naturally will not leave you. This is not some trick—it is basic human nature.

The core wisdom of the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart can be summed up in one word: steadfastness.

Hold on to the people around you, hold on to the warmth in your heart, hold on to the bond that has not yet broken. No matter how much things crumble and decay on the outside, as long as the people on the inside stay together, there is still a chance to turn things around. What is the worst thing? When the outside has not yet collapsed, but the inside falls apart first. Once people’s hearts scatter, there is truly nothing left.

Low Points in Relationships Reveal True Hearts

I have seen so many relationships that are as sweet as honey when things go well, but shatter like glass when they go wrong.

Why? Because good times test your passion; hard times test your actual relationship.

Passion comes fast and goes fast. When the novelty fades, circumstances change, or difficulties arise, things can fall apart in an instant. But real love is not like that. Real love is: I celebrate with you when you are doing well, and I stand by you when you are not.

That is exactly what the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart is talking about. This hexagram is so perilous, with everything crumbling and falling apart everywhere—why does the Six in the Fifth Place instead say “nothing that does not further”? Because it does not compete with others to see who climbs higher; it competes to see who stays longer. When everyone else leaves, it remains; when everyone else scatters, it holds fast.

Applied to relationships, this line carries enormous weight.

When you are successful and surrounded by people, that does not count. Those people are drawn to your glow, not to you. When your light goes out, they will naturally disperse. What really counts is the person who is still willing to stay by your side when you are down on your luck, when things go wrong, when you are nobody.

Wen Laoshi often says that you should not judge a relationship from the top of the mountain—you should judge it from the foot of the mountain. Everyone loves you at the top; that is the mountain’s doing, not yours. When someone still follows you at the foot of the mountain, that is genuine care for you.

Many people do not understand this. They always think love has to be grand, has to feel like a holiday every day, has to stay fresh forever. The moment life becomes plain, the moment difficulties arise, they think the relationship has changed, that their partner no longer loves them. But it is not the relationship that has changed—it is that your understanding of love is too shallow.

Love is not a firework that keeps soaring upward. Love is the Six in the Fifth Place of the Hexagram of Splitting Apart: no matter how much falls away and crumbles on the outside, the people on the inside are still in the same boat, still moving forward together. That is what love really is.

How to Get Through a Low Point in Your Relationship

The Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart tells us that a low point is not the end of a relationship—it is a touchstone for it. If you get through it, your bond will be stronger than before. If you do not, it means the relationship was never strong enough to stand the test in the first place.

So how exactly do you get through it? There are three things you need to understand clearly.

First: do not expect your partner to change overnight. First, hold on to the small amount of warmth you still have right now.

Many people, the moment they hit a relationship problem, want to fix it immediately and go back to the sweet state they were in before. But that is impossible. Why does the Six in the Fifth Place talk about a string of fish? Because fish come one by one, not all swarming at once. The recovery of a relationship is the same: it takes time, patience, and small, gradual steps.

You cannot dismiss all the good times you had just because things are not sweet right now. You have to first hold on to the little things that are still there—maybe the meal you share every day, maybe the goodnight you say before bed, maybe the fact that your partner still consults you when something comes up. These small things may seem trivial, but they are the roots of your relationship. As long as the roots are alive, the tree can survive.

Second: do not only focus on your partner’s flaws. Think more about what they are still doing for you.

When people are at a low point, it is very easy to fixate on their partner’s shortcomings. They notice every little thing wrong, every mistake, and the more they look, the more annoyed they feel, the more wronged they think they are. But look at it from another angle—for all their flaws, why haven’t they left? For all the ways they do not meet your expectations, why are they still by your side?

The wisdom of the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart is this: do not fixate on what you have lost. Fixate on what is still there. When everyone else has left, they are still there; when everyone else has scattered, they are still holding on. That in itself is an answer—one more reliable than any sweet words.

Third: do not make impulsive moves during a low point. Staying steady is already a win.

The Hexagram of Splitting Apart is a hexagram of decline, and the worst thing you can do is act recklessly. The more you stir things up, the faster you will fall. Why does the Six in the Fifth Place bring “nothing that does not further”? Because it does not stir up trouble—it simply leads everyone forward steadily. It is the same with relationship low points: do not threaten to break up every time you fight, do not think about finding someone new every time things get tough, do not think the world is ending every time a problem comes up.

What you should do most during a low point is talk less and do more; complain less and understand more; stir up less and stay steady more. Just like that string of fish in the Hexagram of Splitting Apart: even if they swim slowly, their direction is right, their formation holds, one following another, and they will eventually swim out of the hard place.

True Feelings Show at the Low Point, True Hearts Show in the Plain Days

The Six in the Fifth Place is the warmest line in the Hexagram of Splitting Apart.

It does not teach you how to climb higher, it does not teach you how to turn your fortunes around. It only teaches you one thing: in the worst of times, if you can still hold on to the person beside you, you have already won.

Love is never built on the good times—it is forged by getting through the bad times together.

Anyone can be in a relationship when everything is smooth sailing. The real challenge is: when life gets hard, money gets tight, troubles pile up, and passion fades, are you still willing to walk on with this person?

The answer from the Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart is: yes. And not just willing—like the string of fish, one leading the next, no one left behind. In the end, “nothing that does not further”: not only is there nothing unfavorable, things turn out better than before.

Why? Because you have gotten through the hardest time together. Your relationship is no longer held together by passion—it is held together by trust, loyalty, and that unbreakable bond of fate. A love like that goes the distance.

Put simply, hitting a low point in a relationship is not scary. What is scary is having no one to go through it with you. With someone by your side, even a low point can become a beautiful memory. With no one there, even the peak feels lonely.

The Six in the Fifth Place of Splitting Apart tells you: 贯鱼以宫人宠，无不利。The person who still stands by you when you are at your lowest is the one you should cherish most for the rest of your life. Hold on to them, and you will have nothing to fear for the years ahead.