Xiaoguo Hexagram 62: Pick the Right Person, Not a "VIP" — Reach for the Nearest Ally When You Can’t Climb to the Top

You’re hunting for an apartment, a place to live, or sorting out family matters. You’re chasing the "best" — the best location, the best school district, the best amenities. But your budget can’t stretch that far.

The Six in the Second Place of the Preponderance of the Small hexagram says: If you can’t reach the best, go for what fits.

The line text reads, in twelve characters:

「过其祖，遇其妣。不及其君，遇其臣。无咎。」 (Passing his grandfather, he meets his grandmother. Not reaching his prince, he meets his minister. No blame.)

"Passing his grandfather" — you miss the grandfather figure. "He meets his grandmother" — you encounter the grandmother. "Not reaching his prince" — you don’t catch up to the ruler. "He meets his minister" — you come across the court official. "No blame" — there is no misfortune.

Wen Laoshi says these four lines convey a simple, down-to-earth truth: you didn’t land the most ideal option, but you found one that fits. This "fitting" choice isn’t as good as the "most ideal" one, but it’s enough, it’s available, and it’s willing to help you.

1. The Position of the Six in the Second Place

The Six in the Second Place sits in the middle of the lower trigram of the Preponderance of the Small hexagram. A Yin Line in a yin position, it is in proper position. It is gentle, knows its place, and doesn’t crave higher status.

"Grandfather" and "prince" stand for higher positions and greater power — but the Six in the Second Place can’t reach them. Instead of forcing a chase, it turns to "grandmother" and "minister" — options that can still help, but are more realistic.

Wen Laoshi says this is the wisdom of "Preponderance of the Small": you don’t have to get everything right in one go. You can’t reach the perfect 100-point choice, but an 80-point choice is already great. If you insist on waiting for the perfect one, you might wait forever.

2. "Passing the Grandfather, Meeting the Grandmother" in Home Matters

You’re apartment hunting. Your ideal place is: city center, three bedrooms, top school district, cross-ventilation from north to south, and below market price.

But the reality is — you can’t find such a place. It’s either too expensive, too far out, or has a bad layout. You’ve "passed your grandfather" — the most ideal option is out of reach.

The Six in the Second Place says: then "meet your grandmother" — go for a second-best option. Not the best, but enough. Closer to the subway, a bit smaller but livable, not the best school district but not bad either.

Wen Laoshi says the most important thing about a home is "moving in," not "waiting for perfection." Living comfortably in an 80-point apartment is better than waiting a lifetime for the perfect one.

3. The Practical Meaning of "Not Reaching the Prince, Meeting the Minister"

It’s not just apartment hunting — you’ll run into plenty of "out of reach" situations in life. You want the best doctor, the best lawyer, the best teacher — but the best might not be available, might not suit you, or might be out of your budget.

The Six in the Second Place tells you: "meet the minister" — find someone reliable who isn’t the absolute top. A good minister isn’t that much worse than a prince — but they’re more willing to help, have more time for you, and are more down-to-earth.

Wen Laoshi says perfectionism is the biggest enemy of efficiency. While you’re waiting for perfection, time slips by and opportunities vanish. Better to take a step back — find something "good enough" and start now.

4. How to Tell What’s "Good Enough"

Step 1: List your non-negotiables. Not the "best," but the "must-haves" — things you can’t do without. Usually there are only three to five of these.

Step 2: List your nice-to-haves. Better if you have them, fine if you don’t.

Step 3: Filter by your non-negotiables — whatever meets them is "good enough." You don’t need to check every nice-to-have box.

Step 4: Decide quickly. Lock in a "good enough" option when you find one — don’t keep searching for the "best."

Wen Laoshi says the "No blame" of the Six in the Second Place of the Preponderance of the Small hexagram doesn’t come for free — it’s the reward you get when you let go of obsessions and accept reality.

Put simply, life isn’t an exam — you don’t need a perfect score to pass. Eighty points is already great.