I Ching Hexagram 39 Jian: Stop Chasing Mentors in Low Points, 9th Five Line Says Help Comes When You Persevere

This is perfectly laid out in the fifth line of the Obstruction Hexagram in the I Ching (Book of Changes).

Have you ever been in a spot like this—

Your career falls apart, your money’s gone,

Everyone around you bails,

You crash straight from the top to rock bottom,

Even catching your breath feels like a struggle.

You hit up every friend you know for help,

Chase every chance to turn things around,

Beg every influential person you can find to give you a leg up.

And what happens?

People dodge you if they can,

Push you away if they can’t,

The harder you reach out,

The more you feel like the world’s cold and cruel,

The more you think no one’s got your back.

Why does this happen?

Is the world just too ruthless?

Are people just too heartless?

Not exactly.

The fifth line of the Obstruction Hexagram in the I Ching

Is all about life’s hardest moments.

The line text is four characters: 大蹇朋来 (Great Obstruction, Friends Come).

When hardship hits hard,

Friends show up to help.

You might hear that and say,

“That can’t be right—when I was at my lowest,

How come no one came to help me?”

Hold on,

First take a look at what the Nine in the Fifth Place (九五) is like.

The Nine in the Fifth Place is a Yang Line (solid —) sitting in a yang position,

It’s also in the ruler’s position and the central position,

Centered, upright, firm and strong,

It has integrity, inner stability, and can hold its ground.

Precisely because it can hold on, stay true to what’s right, and not fall apart,

People below it, friends far away, and all kinds of influential people

Will come to help it.

Put simply—

Friends don’t come because you beg for them;

They come because you stay centered and upright.

Influential supporters don’t come because you flatter them;

They show up naturally when you hold your ground.

Why no one helps you when you’re at rock bottom

Don’t rush to call everyone else selfish and snobbish.

First check what state you’re in yourself.

First type: You fall apart first.

The second things go wrong, you check out completely,

You throw in the towel and stop caring,

You blame everyone and everything but yourself.

If you’ve given up on yourself,

Who can save you?

Even if someone tried to help, you’d be too far gone to pick back up.

Second type: You abandon your bottom line.

When times are tough,

You’ll make money any way you can,

You’ll do anything no matter how shady,

You’ll hang out with anyone no matter how bad they are.

You end up ruining your own reputation,

And all your friends drift away.

If you’ve gone off the right path yourself,

Who would dare take your side?

Third type: You panic and grab at any random solution.

You beg everyone for help, try your luck anywhere,

Plead with this person, grovel to that one,

And end up either scammed or taken advantage of,

Making your situation even worse.

If you’re all scattered and disorganized yourself,

Even if an influential person wanted to give you a hand,

They wouldn’t be able to find your hand to grab.

So you see,

It’s not that no one wants to help you—

It’s that your own state is off,

So even people who want to help can’t.

The I Ching says “it is through central correctness and integrity” (以中节也),

That’s exactly what this means—

Friends come when disaster strikes

Because you have centered, upright integrity

And a character that stays true to what’s right.

If you lose that,

“Friends coming” is just empty words.

What “central correctness and integrity” means

Central correctness and integrity

Is the quality of being centered, upright, and principled.

It sounds a bit mysterious,

But it really just boils down to three bottom lines.

First: The moral bottom line.

No matter how hard things get, never do anything cruel or unethical.

No matter how much you suffer, never cheat or harm others.

No matter how poor you are, never make dirty money.

Hold onto your moral bottom line,

And your reputation stays intact,

And your friends won’t leave you.

Second: The principle bottom line.

No matter how hard things get, never abandon your principles.

No matter how much you suffer, never just go with the crowd.

No matter how poor you are, never lose your dignity.

Hold onto your principles,

And your sense of self stays intact,

And others will respect you.

Third: The action bottom line.

No matter how hard things get, never check out and give up.

No matter how much you suffer, never quit.

No matter how tired you are, never stop putting in the work.

Hold onto your drive to act,

And hope stays alive,

And opportunities will still come your way.

If you hold onto these three things,

You’ll have value, you’ll be worth helping,

And friends and influential supporters will naturally seek you out.

How to climb out of life’s low points

Step one: Hold your ground first.

Don’t fall apart, don’t panic, don’t go off the right path.

Hold onto your reputation,

Hold onto your principles,

Hold onto your bottom line.

Even if you can’t do anything else right now,

Don’t do bad things, don’t lose who you are.

When you’re at a low point,

Don’t fixate on how to climb up right away—

First focus on not sliding further down.

Step two: Build up your strength next.

A low point isn’t the time to charge forward;

It’s the time to stock up and prepare.

While things are hard,

Take the time to reflect, learn, and work on yourself.

Fix what you’re missing,

Improve what you’re bad at.

Build up your inner strength and skills,

So when an opportunity comes,

You’ll be able to grab it.

Step three: Make your move last.

When friends show up, influential supporters come, and opportunities arise,

Don’t hesitate, don’t be overly polite—

Grab the chance and move up.

All the strength you built, the integrity you held onto, the inner skills you practiced—

That all comes into play right here.

大蹇朋来 (Great Obstruction, Friends Come)—

Hold your ground, and friends will come;

Get prepared, and opportunities will come.

A final word

In this life,

Everyone goes through rough patches.

When times are hard,

Don’t run around chasing random fixes, don’t panic and grab at any solution, don’t give up on yourself.

First hold onto who you are—

Hold onto your reputation, your principles, your bottom line,

No matter how hard it gets, never stray from the right path.

Then build up your strength—

Use the low point to reflect, learn, and work on yourself,

Build up your inner skills and strength.

Then wait for the opportunity—

Hold your ground, and friends will come, supporters will come, opportunities will come,

Grab that chance and move up.

大蹇朋来 (Great Obstruction, Friends Come)—

When things are hardest, friends show up.

But the catch is,

You have to hold on first, don’t fall apart.

以中节也 (It is through central correctness and integrity)—

Friends you gain by staying centered and upright are real friends;

Here’s the reminder from the fifth line of the Obstruction Hexagram—remember: when you’re at your hardest point, don’t try to tough it out alone. Finding the right people to lean on is true wisdom.

The wisdom of this fifth line of the Obstruction Hexagram, put simply, is this: when times are hard, choosing the right direction matters more than pushing through blindly.

Influential supporters you attract through your own virtue are real supporters.